Combatting Loneliness

1. Pour Out Your Heart To God

Honestly friends, this is needed! Do what I did. Let yourself feel the sadness, the ache, the loneliness, and give that to God. Even if you're mad at God because it hasn't happened yet, tell Him! He can handle it. He's not scared of your emotions. Even if you've already done that, sometimes, you need to do it again. Release that; don't hold it in.

Psalm 142 is a wonderful Psalm written by David that is titled, You Are My Refuge. Verse 2 says, "I pour out my complaints before Him and tell Him all my troubles." (NLT) God is a refuge for us. I absolutely love that about God! I can tell Him everything and anything, and He listens.

So, share your heart. Express the hurt. Express the disappointment. And then get quiet and allow Him to talk to you. Allow Him to bring peace and comfort in this season.

2. Cast Down Thoughts

The devil would love nothing more than make you bitter at God, depressed, self-loathe and remain stuck where you are. DON'T give the devil that power!

Look, I understand friend. I am 43 years old, never been married and have no children. AND I'm a virgin for crying out loud! So, as a woman who has been living right and living according to scripture, and it still hasn't happened yet, don't you think I can relate??? Talk about waiting long, y'all. I know allllllllll about it!

So when the devil brings thoughts to your mind that it's never going to happen, or that nobody would want you because you're too ugly, too fat, too skinny, too old, annoying, difficult, stupid, etc., you have to learn to combat those thoughts with the Word of God. Don't let those thoughts linger. Cast them down right away! An example would be to say, "No! I don't receive that. That is not my future. I rebuke that thought in Jesus' name." Or something like that, and then speak God's Word over you. That's exactly what Jesus did in Matthew 4. Every temptation the devil brought, Jesus came against it with the Word. But you're not going to be able to fight loneliness in this season of life if you don't know what God's Word says for yourself. The temptation will be to succumb to those thoughts. 2 Corinthians 10:3-5 explains this to us, "3 For though we walk in the flesh [as mortal men], we are not carrying on our [spiritual] warfare according to the flesh and using the weapons of man. 4 The weapons of our warfare are not physical [weapons of flesh and blood]. Our weapons are divinely powerful for the destruction of fortresses. 5 We are destroying sophisticated arguments and every exalted and proud thing that sets itself up against the [true] knowledge of God, and we are taking every thought and purpose captive to the obedience of Christ..." (AMP)

3. Speak The Word

Here, I'm going to give you a list of verses that I want you to take the time to look up. Read them over and over. Memorize them. Let the Word get in your heart, and then come out of your mouth. Confess it, speak it over yourself. And when you read these verses, put your name in it, and speak them in 1st person.

4. Meaningful Connections

In 2023, the U.S. Surgeon General declared loneliness and isolation a major public health risk due to its substantial harm to individuals and society. It has been labeled as an epidemic, and declared a public health crisis.

Listen to how they described the impact of loneliness:

• Impact:

  Loneliness is a feeling of being disconnected from others and has significant effects on health, including increased risks for anxiety, depression, heart disease, stroke, dementia, and premature death. 

This is NOT going to be us, y'all! This is why you need to be in community. If there are no good churches around your area, then join an online community of Believers that can encourage you and pray for you.

Even though I have a home church that I love, and where I am being fed spiritually, I often times go visit other churches to see what their small groups are like. Honestly, I don't particularly feel super connected to people who are my age, and at the same stage in life from my church. So I look elsewhere for that connection. And there's nothing wrong with that. Maybe that's what some of you need to do. I encourage you to pray and ask God to bring Godly friends down your pathway that you can really connect with.

No man is an island. We all need connection. We were made for relationship.